gift of sunshine this Christmas

So now I'm home for the holidays, after bidding St. Louis adieu until commencement in May. I managed to return safely to NC after a harrowing 14+ hour drive, moving all my shit back with m in preparation of Singapore for the spring semester. :D Party on, dudes. Last semester is going to be so much more about food and drinking and traveling and seeing people than it is about law. But I've totally earned this, right?

Strangely, perhaps, the nostalgia hasn't hit me. It might yet, or it might wait until I'm actually back in the Lou in May before plaguing me with fond memories. I will miss seeing the people there while I'm in Singapore, of course, but for the most part I am just excited about being in a new part of the world.

Though I'm not even thinking that far ahead right now. Right now, I am focused on the holiday cruise I'm going on tomorrow with family! We're leaving out of Charleston and headed down to the Bahamas for five days. A sunny and warm Christmas, I hope, to go with the sunny and warm winter I'll be spending in Singapore. I am all up for this. Cold weather, I've had enough of you, thanks. I will not miss the cute coats and scarves all that much.

After I get back, I'll meet up with M and A at least, then be just productive enough to wrap up some last-minute things and pack for Singapore.

For now, I am looking forward to sunshine and fruity alcoholic drinks. Happy holidays!

it's like trying to ford the damn river

I've finished packing all my clothes and books (save the textbooks I plan on selling back) and have come to the conclusion that owning clothes and books is a pain in the ass. Or at at least the transportation of them is. Why has no one invented teleportation yet? Why is that not recognized as a real word? (I have many questions.) I also keep looking around and noticing things that will need to be packed that I can't currently do anything about, e.g., my lamp, my sheets/blankets/pillows, and bathroom things. Sorry, I actually sort of need those at the moment. I am legitimately concerned about whether I can shove everything into my car at this rate. If worse comes to worst though, I should be able to store some things at J's place until we can come pick it up in May. Argh, stress!

Honestly, I am much more stressed now than I was while doing exams, which is weird because 'm not actually on a deadline since I can choose when I'm leaving... Still...

I am half-afraid one of my tires is going to blow out on me while driving back, but it might be paranoia speaking. I'm taking the southerly route so there shouldn't be much if any snow (also I should be on giant interstates anyway), but (insert irrational panic) should I get my car's oil changed and get a check-up before I go?! I'm also tempted to leave at, like, 3am and just miss out on the traffic since I'm going to have to drive in the dark regardless. This way I'll end up at home earlier too.

Oh moving in the winter, I hate you. Let's never do this again.

Now I will inhale some coffee because, yeah, caffeine withdrawl headaches are a sad part of the life of an addict, i.e., me. Also I will eat some food and watch some Top Chef because it is that or have a needless stress meltdown. Option B is the wrong answer here.

catching up on catching you up

News from the exam front:

I received my score from my MPRE this week and passed comofortably: I am sufficiently ethical to practice law! Granted, that is not a very high standard. Which is probably more or less indicative of the reality of things, as I am not very ethical anyway. Ethics only get in the way! Sort of like laws. If we didn't have laws, as J said today while we were studying, we would have no crime! Easy solution. In any case, my scores were sent to NY because if I take a bar exam, it will be for NY, which is most internationally applicable (and is accepted for working in DC as well - handily done, DC; I approve).

So here is an adventure in exam-taking: yesterday's exam, Evidence, I took in the morning. It was a three hour thing with short answer and a multiple choice section - not the funnest of ways to spend three hours on a Tuesday morning, but since when is law school fun? I finished the test, pressed save+exit on my exam software, and then every student's exam nightmare became reality: ExamSoft, the exam program, blandly informs me there was an error in the saving+exiting process and that my computer would now reboot. Upon reboot, I was advised by the program to seek proctor. We have no aid to give you in your time of despair, is what the program essentially said to me, heartlessly.

The error? Your exam file can't be found!

My face? Something like D: Actually.

So I got to spend the next hour chasing down proctors, computer technicians, and the registrar, only to end up calling ExamSoft and having them remotely access my computer and alter the back-up file of my exam from the back-up format into the accepted format, then upload and submit that.

Good times were had by all.

By which I mean that once I got to lunch (an hour late), I decided this exam adventure warranted delicious sushi and some alcohol. I was successful in achieving both, at least. But it's over and it's fine: I didn't end up frantically typing made-up rules of Evidence and filling in bubbles at random for nothing.

In food news? I had some brie with fig jam on crackers a week or so ago: so fucking delicious I couldn't get it out of my head. How delicious does this look? It is about 100x more delicious to eat.



Some recipes. Yum. Get me some and I will live off this for the rest of exam period.

everything all the time, stolen from the world

This is the year I stopped writing.

forever on a path of no return

Oh, look at how good I am about maintaining a blog: abysmal. Can I lay the blame on this being my last semester here in St. Louis? 3L year is apparently hell on motivation, as in I lack any whatsoever.

Overall the semester's going fairly well, though. Dealing with the logistics of being in Singapore next semester, keeping up with Liverpool, and maintaining the utmost celebrity crush on Tom Hardy, who is too much of a paradox to exist as a real person (an amalgamation of everything I never thought I'd like in a guy but do when it's him). Also, Joseph Gordon-Levitt is highly relevant to my interests, but mostly in a shallow damn-he-looks-good-in-a-suit way.

Clearly my mind's been on law recently...

In that vein, I took October trips to visit L in DC and then to visit C in Chicago, meeting up with L and L. Good times were had. Memories were made. No law was learned. And yet I'm totally okay with that.

Just another two weeks of pretending I care about school until Thankgiving! Flying home to NC to see family and eat until I burst; looking forward to it and also HP next Friday!

coasting on these august waves

So the reason I've been so AWOL since coming back to NC is that the day after I get home, on Friday, a ton of my mom's old college roommates and classmates have come into town for a 30 year reunion type thing. She and J's dad know the same people, so it's an assortment of random Chinese people come from all over the US (Cali, Philly, STL, Toronto even...) to congregate here for the weekend to catch up and then head out to the beach for three days. So that's been busy and loud and full of Chinese! I've helped entertain some (actually exercising Chinese skills, omg, they are so rusty) and have otherwise hid out some too.

We then headed out to the beach for a week: Emerald Isle, NC. There was a house and it was full of people and the beach was lovely, the water was warm, and much food and relaxation (and mahjong) was had by all. I am now home and ridiculously tan and whining about skin cancer to all who will put up with me. It was a ton of fun though. FB contains all my pictures.

In some other updates -- my brother's voice has dropped! What is this growing up business, really? Still, J's little brother John (now seven, attending second grade, utterly adorable) remains my surrogate little brother. He's a total sweetheart and he makes me ridiculously happy. I sort of wish I'd been older and better able to appreciate my own brother's cuteness at that age; when he was 7, however, I was 16 and surly about him in the way of all teenage girls, I suppose. Now it's his turn to be the sullen teenager...

Also, I finally got around to reading and finishing The White Road by Lynn Flewelling and I enjoyed it much more than Shadows Return. But mostly it makes me crave the first two books of the series but I suppose I am glad that the series is continuing. I am also excited for Lorna Freeman's The Flames of Reckoning, though that will be ages before it's complete, much less out for public consumption. :(

In movie news, I watched RockNRolla, a ridiculous Guy Ritchie movie about London gangsters with British accents, heists and intrigue and action, and Tom fucking Hardy. His part was minor but I sort of rolled over in glee every single time he was on screen. He was fantastic as Handsome Bob. I wanted to hug him a lot when I didn't want to lick him, I DON'T KNOW, MY HORMONES ARE OUT OF WHACK WHEN IT COMES TO TOM HARDY. God. I want a sequel to this movie. (Or "This Means War". Right the fuck now.) On a more serious note, while Tom Hardy didn't have a huge role in the movie, I think he did a very good job acting and getting into his character. I will get on his and JGL's other movies soonish!

I was going to watch Velvet Goldmine today but instead watched EPL: Liverpool v. Arsenal. Cole got redcarded during his debut, ahh, I hope he is all right physically; Stevie played and looked absolutely fit; Nando was subbed in late in the second half and everyone sang his song (which delights me because fuck yeah TORRES TORRES); Agger might have gotten a concussion; and poor Reina scored an own goal in the 90th or so minute to equalize after a long Liverpool lead. ;__;. But I have faith in my team! And, yes, I suppose I've acceded to the fact that they are my team now. I will work on being a proper fan.

Ugh, I don't want to think about the RL I must face in a week, heading back to STL to pack and move and prep for the fall semester. This semester will be wretched busy with classes and work and Note editing and MPRE-studying (fucking ethics, how do they work) and form-filling (to hash out visas and applications and things I will need for my spring exchange to Singapore!!!).

But for now, I am content in these last vestiges of summer break.

lose yourself in a collective summer dream

Yesterday was National Cheesecake Day! So cheesecake was half off at The Cheesecake Factory - and that of course meant I had to drive over and pick up a slice, because you don't pass up a chance like that! I got fresh strawberry, which is just original with strawberries & whipped cream and it was like a little piece of culinary heaven. I have low standards, whatever. :D I'm also craving TCF's Jamaican black pepper shrimp like a mofo, but the crowds at the restaurant yesterday were out of control crazy: because it was Friday night, of course, but also because of the 1/2 price cheesecake. I'll get my shrimp another day...

I watched the first episode of the BBC's new series Sherlock last night. Modern day Sherlock Holmes, and it was fun! It makes me want to reread the Sherlock Holmes books and dive back into mystery books; I can't remember a lot of the Agatha Christie I've read, so let's do that...

Unrelated to that: on Tuesday, I met up with J and H and C at the MUNY (outdoor ampitheater - is that redundant?) to watch a production of The Sound of Music.

It was lovely. ♥ Okay, it was hot and muggy as hell, but the production itself was lovely. I loved the sets and sort of wish I'd done theater in school, ever... But the singers were all very good and very reminiscent of the movie. It also brought back all these memories of my childhood; The Sound of Music was my mom's favorite movie and I've seen it so many times. I still have most of all the songs memorized. I remember singing them all the time.

It's also been ages since I've seen it since I've become an ~adult~, so it was with a new perspective. The duet between Maria and Captain von Trapp, Something Good, made me tear up because it's just so lovely. It was my mom's favorite song from the movie and I remember not understanding why as a kid - it was boring and slow and not full of kids being cute. Now that I'm a little more grown up, I think I have a better idea. :)

(There was also a lot of "woman belongs to man" sentiments that made me roll my eyes with my new adult perspective and knowledge, but I know what time period it's from and, yeah, nostalgia-colored glasses make me a little indulgent.)

I've also resolved that if I'm ever to write again, I will have to be drunk. The mental block is strong with me.

I have other thoughts floating around my head but I don't feel like articulating them right now. :/ I will conclude by saying that I'm feeling sort of off today - gotta have to get over that if I want to plan out my week. A dinner party with people tomorrow (jerk chicken and rum punch!), oil change appointment on Monday, gotta pack to go home, and so on...

can you feel the change in your bones?

And if your plane fell out of the skies
Who would you call with your last goodbye?
Should be so careful who we left out of our lives
And when we long for absolution, there will be no one on the line


Let's try again. Breaking it down to its simplest form: don't put life on hold to have an existential crisis about what you want. Figure it out while living your life as it is before you.

We only got 86,400 seconds in a day
To turn it all around or to throw it all away
We gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we're dying


I've never been a music person. But, suddenly, it's like I'm listening again - and the words matter. (The words have always mattered though; I just wasn't paying attention.)