I'm confused and conflicted and possibly other words that start with "con". I think that prefix is indicative of the entire process. It's not so great.
The problem with getting upset about one thing is that it manages to make me think about all the other things I could be getting upset about, and then I end up stupid and emo. Look, I'd choose not to be this way if I had a choice. I don't like having my emotions so easily manipulated.
But as of right now, they kind of are. I feel stupid. I feel like my emotions are on a roller coaster I don't get to control. I feel like I have no idea what to do, or what I want.
This is so stupid. At least I provide entertainment for those around me. They're too good to me, really.
I wish I knew what I wanted. Or how to get it. Or had the courage to carry through. Any or all of that would be nice.
I think, in lieu of any answers or solutions, I'm just going to get bubble tea. Hot. And then read Property until my brain is numb; thinking is clearly a bad idea. As is feeling.
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